Having gotten over my fixation with Red Bull, finally, it is time to move on to phase 2.  The date.  So apparently the new hook-up, or at least new to me is OkCupid.com.  I have to say that having done the paid eHarmony, and the free Craigslist, I find this to be a happy medium.  I have had my profile up for two days now.  Seen some interesting guys.

Today a biker dude ‘winked’ at me.  I debated on what to do about it for a while.  On one hand, it could be interesting.  I can’t say I’ve ever met a real genuine tattooed Hells Angel and he looks like the real thing.  Think of the stories I could tell!…the look on my mothers face as she hits the ground in a dead faint… the look on bosses face when I bring him to a work function…  We all want the bad boy right?

I went on a read his profile.  It was actually quite good.  He sounds intelligent and somewhat interesting.  Okay, so now I dig deeper. One of the questions that he would like his potential dates to answer, and I swear I’m not making this up, is ‘How do you feel about having sex with a person who is HIV positive.’  Stick a fork in me, I’m done!

Now before you leave the irate comments about how you can have a meaningful sexual relationship with a partner who is HIV positive, consider how you would react if your daughter/sister/friend came to you and said, ‘I just met a guy on the Internet that I want to go out with in the hope of establishing a meaningful relationship. Oh, and he’s HIV positive.’  I understand wanting to get everything out there up front, but there is something to be said for taking your time in self-disclosure.  Some stuff really should be held back until you know someone a lot better.  But that’s just my opinion.

The whole online dating thing can be so… laborious.  The sad thing is that as a single person living in a metropolitan US city, it really is one of the most effective (note I did not say best) ways to meet a person of the opposite sex. It takes so much energy to generate a half hour date that you hope will be interesting enough that you want to see the person again.  I have friends who love the whole online dating carousel. They honestly enjoy meeting new people.  They embark on each new date with the perfect balance of optimism and realism, and they have the wonderful ability to shrug their shoulder philosophically and move on if the person they meet is a total jerk.  I wish I could do that.  However, as a friend of mine once said to me, ‘Everything with you is so high stakes!’ And to me, it really is.

So my new challenge is to stop tweaking and re-tweaking my profile and get out there! Wink at a few people and actually *gasp* send a few people a message.  I can do this!… sort of… on Tuesday…

Image: Black Cupid – Fork by *NeoSlashott on deviantART

The journey to fabulosity is not exactly starting with a bang.  Usually when you start a weight loss program, in my case its Weight Watchers, the weigh falls off almost effortlessly to start and then you hit the plateau.  I have decided to be original and start with the plateau.  At the this my second official week, I am up.  UP!!! How is that possible?  Isn’t my commitment to the lifestyle supposed to start after I have had some time to enjoy some wins? ARRGGHHH!

In the true tradition of Murphy’s law, this is the week that Red Bull decides to go AWOL.  ‘Red Bull?’ you ask.  Let me explain.  A Red Bull is a guy who, like the drink, gives you a false high that doesnt last, has no nutritional value, and  always leads to a crash after it wears off.  You know he’s no good for you, but you keep going back becasue you love the high.  You know it wont last. You know that you’ll feel like crap later.  You KNOW that its ultimalty no good for you, but there it is. In a moment of willful weakness you’ll reach for the Red Bull instead of doing the hard work becasue its there and it will do in a pinch.  So yes, Red Bull did as Red Bulls do.  I HATE the crash.  This time I swear I’m done.  I know I’ve said this before but I’m done… Really… For real.

Anyway, the whole aim of getting goal’d is a total change in the way I live so that I can enjoy my best life now. My quote for this week has been something that Dawn French said, “If I had been around when Rubens was painting, I would have been revered as a fabulous model. Kate Moss? Well, she would have been the paintbrush.” Its cute, and a little funny, but the point remains that you have to embrace who you are, and celebrate it.  So even though I am not at my goal weight, and I’m keep allowing myself to get sidetracked by Red Bulls, I know I’m worth more than this. God has made me for more than just existing. I don’t want to simply tolerate my life.  I need to enjoy it as it is, even as I look forward to a better me.

The current me rocks! Fabulosity begins today.

I know that there are thousands of blogs out there, covering everything from dating, to weight loss, to child birth, to why deodorant causes cancer.  So why am I starting a blog?  Well, I have random things to say.  I have a life… sort of. Seriously though, there are certain things that I want to accomplish in the next year.  By setting up this virtual blog/diary, I hope to record my journey both for me and for friends who might benefit from it.

So here goes!